Playdates and other tiny terrors

Posted on September 3, 2010 by Diana

I joined meetup.com when I moved, in hopes of getting to know other moms in the area with kids around Bella’s age. One of them was the S&L (where I live) Healthy Moms. I was excited to see that most of their members were all about cloth diapering, being organic, and getting healthy.

So when I got the invitation for a 7-12 month old playdate at someone’s home, you think I would have been all over it, right?

Nope.

Instead, I have spent the past week pondering even going. It’s next Thursday and all I can think of is,

  • “What if no one there likes me?”
  • “What if they all already know each other and I’m the weird person that showed up to some lady’s home?”
  • “Should I bring a gift for the hostess? Does that scream kiss up? If I don’t, and everyone else does, can I go home?”
  • “What if they look at me and think, ‘Um, to join this you have to be healthy and you look like you swallowed a bicycle tire.’?”
  • “What if Bella bonks some kid on the head and the mom flips out on me?”

So needless to say, I’m shaking in my boots (my imaginary new fall suede knee highs that I won’t be able to buy) from the thought of attending and….

The Unknown.

Which is the story of my life. :)

So any tips on getting over this? Attending a playdate with moms you’ve never met at a home you’ve never been to? Playdate etiquette?

Posted in Babies, Growing Up | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

AP’ing at 9 months – not by choice

Posted on September 2, 2010 by Diana

Bella has suddenly decided to get all AP (Attachment Parenting) on me. Some of it has to do with the drama of the past few weeks, moving, a new place to get used to. But this was starting even at the old house.

She’ll wake up happy from a nap, and come out with me into the kitchen, pat me on the shoulder (we sing the “Pat pat pat the Mommy” song) and be in a great mood.

Then I go to put her down. Anywhere. Floor, playpen, jumpy – and she’ll instantly stiffen herself out, flip on her stomach the moment she’s down, start to sob hysterically, climb up or across the room at me, and scream on full blast.

Forever. As if everything I put her in also contains some kind of boiling liquid that eats her flesh off.

Tears stream down her cheeks as she throws herself all over the place trying to get me to take her out or pick her up. The sobs get louder, snot runs down her face and the more I wipe it, the more inconsolable she becomes.

Then comes the inevitable falling over because she has worked herself into a frenzy, which means she bumps her head or leg against a toy or soft part of the playpen. This is beyond anything she can handle, and so she takes it up another notch to, “I’M GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE CARES AND I AM PROBABLY BLEEDING ALL OVER AND MY LEG IS BEING SEVERED OFF BY THE STUFFED BUNNY AND MY SNOT IS SUFFOCATING ME – NOOOOOOOO!! MOOOOOMMMMMYYYYY!!!!!!”

This leads to me taking her out because I don’t want to hear it, or listen to her sad crying anymore. And friends, I have tried. I have left her in there and hardened my heart against the screaming to get her to play by herself once in a while.

Not only does it not work, she figures out that next time she needs to start this a lot sooner. Like if she is within 10ft of the playpen or jumpy. Or feels me moving in a downward direction.

I would like for her to be able to play on her own. Now, to be fair, if she’s in her crib, she will play by herself for a while – either before going to sleep or after she wakes up from a happy nap. (Angry naps are a whole different matter.)

But if she can see me, it’s over.

Therefore I end up carrying her around all day. Much to her delight.

*sigh*

Posted in Babies | Tagged , , | 9 Comments

Working Girl

Posted on September 1, 2010 by Diana

There are a lot of things going on in our life right now, but I’m not really sure I can or want to discuss them at this point. Even privately. So for right now, I’m just going to focus on some of the upcoming stuff in our lives.

I am going back to work – part time. I’m pretty excited about it. Yes, I adore being at home with Bella, but I don’t know anyone here, and I’d love for her to be around other kids. I’d also love to earn a paycheck again. So I’m looking into being a nanny with her.

As you may (or may not if you’re fairly new) know, I was a nanny for about 3 years in San Diego. Loved it. I have thought about opening up our apartment to a family, but the tax stuff I have to deal with, along with our home being a business and not a place of relaxation, and to try to deal with hauling kids up and down three flights of stairs to go anywhere really turned me off to that idea.

I’m going to start searching Craigslist for nanny positions. The hard part?

Bella. :/

Not that I don’t want her along (because I do), just that most agencies won’t work with me if I bring her, it lowers the amount of pay I can get, and it eliminates a lot of jobs. About 70% of families looking for a nanny don’t want another child in the mix.

But I figure, it only takes one family to want us as a package. I’ll just wait until the right one comes along. I will not put my child in daycare if it’s possible for me to work and have her with me.

I’ll be posting about my interviews, the ups and downs and all the fun (and crazy) stuff that comes with it. If you want to know what it’s like, you can search for “nanny” in my search box and up will pop all the stories from before, or click the “Life as a Nanny” tag below this post.

And yes, I worked and interviewed with some crazies. Rich people tend to be a leetle bit more insane than most. :p

Posted in Working | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

Little things

Posted on August 28, 2010 by Diana

Our house is under contract.

:)

I am giddy with excitement. Yes, it’s a short sale. Yes, it’s way below the original price.

None of that matters. We are so glad this finally happened. The couple initially said they wanted a three bedroom, but Monday morning came back with an offer. The house will be used to store skis and as a vacation home in the winter. (Must be nice, huh? Lol)

So we accepted their offer, they sent earnest money, and barring the bank being stupid, we close October 15th.

It’s hard to go back. I still have to go clean and get stuff out of the garage. I went back Wednesday and started crying, thinking of all the memories our home holds. I will miss it dearly.

However, this journey has made me grateful for an offer I might not have considered 4 months ago, and ready to say goodbye to the stress of a home and mortgage that I didn’t think I could say. The unknown and the mess that got bigger with an apartment payment thrown in the mix, is fixed by the house being gone.

The relief is much greater than the sadness.

We have a lot of other stuff going on, but this chapter is closed. Out of it comes a stronger faith, a shame of the stress and worry I spent on it over the months, a better knowledge of our finances, and what buying something you can’t afford long term can really end up costing.

Lessons learned. Good, and tough. But I wouldn’t change it one bit.

Posted in Moving, Thankful | 8 Comments

Protected: And we’re here.

Posted on August 24, 2010 by Diana

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