Part of me doesn’t want to blog anymore. After almost a year of it, I’ve realized how therapeutic it is, yet I feel myself trying to post things that won’t offend or hurt people’s feelings. This is my own fault. Sam reminded me yesterday that it’s my blog, I should be able to write what I want.
But I’m having a hard time doing that. There is an idea in my head of shutting this one down and starting an anonymous blog. Never telling anyone, just blogging for me. This is a very freeing thought.
On the other hand, it’s a saddening thought too. I’ve put a lot of time and emotion into my blog, and I do love it.
As 2010 draws to a close today, my blog is there as a story for me to look back on. But the past few months, I’ve noticed my posts becoming more benign and less about how I really feel about things. I write each post with the lurking question, “How can I say this and not make anyone mad?” And 99% of the time I never publish it.
So instead of starting over somewhere new, I’m starting over here.
My 2011 blogging resolution is to become a better blogger – following my heart as I write. I’m not out to be malicious or intentionally hurt anyone – but if someone gets offended over something I write I have to learn to let it go. I’m not doing any good to myself if I can’t blog about how life and my beliefs really are.
I plan on my blog becoming a strong voice for things I am passionate about. I know not everyone in my life or my readers will agree with me on things I post, but I do hope they will read to gain a different perspective or just to be entertained. If not, there are many other bloggers out there who do write on the things they believe in.
As a kind of pre-cursor to what I am turning the blog into, I’ll say that it’s going to define who I am and who I am still working on becoming -
- I am a Christian, but I am not a conservative.
- I am into natural parenting, but I trust my doctor on many issues.
- I am still struggling to find a way to balance those two main beliefs in my life with each other.
- I am an Army wife and support the troops 100%, but I have my doubts about this war.
- I struggle every day with how I feel about gay rights and how my upbringing says I should feel.
- I equally dislike Rush Limbaugh and Keith Olberman.
- I have a hard time taking a stand on an issue that I’ve never lived – like abortion for incest victims.
These are all issues and topics I want to blog on. And that I think on every day. I need to write them out, if only to begin to find a way to understand them better.
Am I looking forward to possibly getting hate mail or angry comments? No. But I’m also tired of sitting down to write and feeling as if I’m saying the same old thing over and over about being a mommy, wife, and blogger. My blog has become Pleasantville to me. It’s boring, and I don’t want a boring blog. So I’m ready to take what comes.
Saying goodbye to a wonderful, life changing 2010 and ready to live an interesting 2011…
Twitter: AccustomedChaos
says:
I understand that feeling of not wanting to hurt peoples feelings. I struggle with that one too. It is hard to put yourself out there like that and get criticism and opposing views. I am trying to learn not to take things personally.
Looking forward to debatable posts from you
Happy new year!
Devan @ Accustomed Chaos just wrote Happy 2011- Accustomed Chaos Turns ONE Year Old
Twitter: bransonlee
says:
Oh my goodness I have been feeling the exact same way! Even had the same urge to go anonymous! But I agree with the statement that it is your blog and you should be able to write what you want! Let’s hope we can BOTH make our blogs truly our own in 2011!
Branson just wrote A Little Naptime Hopping! Top 10 photos and 5 question Friday
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
says:
I think everyone gets to that point – you know? But I’m glad we’re pulling through it, and I’ll be sure to stop by and see what you’ve written too!
You’re awesome!! Being open and honest doesn’t mean that you’re going to intentionally be malicious, and other people need to get their heads out of their butts and stop letting so many things bother them. For the people that you’ve never met in real life: Who gives a flip what they think?? They ultimately don’t know the REAL you, and their impact (with harsh words written in a comment) can be lessened with a little button I like to call “Delete.”
For the people that you do know in real life: If they love you, then they will accept you. Every part of you. And it doesn’t mean that they have to agree with you, but they shouldn’t be hags about how they treat you just because you posted about something they didn’t like.
And for the record, I love reading your blog, you know I check it like every day to see if you’ve written anything new, or if there are any new comments. But I can’t wait to read about what really matters to you, and the haters can go suck it.
I totally agree Jen! I am friends w/ people who have done things I dont agree with and believe in things I don’t, but they are still good people and it shouldn’t matter.
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
says:
Oh Jen. I love you.
I love this! I think you should have a voice on YOUR blog, and if people don’t like it, lets get an educated and mature discussion going people! I mean, hate email? seriously? Like that’s going to change your mind? Whatevs! I guess that’s just something you can’t get around though nowadays :/ Everyone is entitled to their own opionion, it’s not rocket science. We should discuss in person :0
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
says:
We should. I still have your Xmas present. And I’ve gotten hate mail before, but not for a looong time.
There you go! That is what this is all about. In fact, my blog is still anonymous for just that reason, I don’t want to edit myself. You are more courageous than me…. here’s to 2011!
Not There Yet just wrote Pom Pom Color Choices
I think it’s awesome, that your doing this. Have to say I feel the same way you do on alot of the issues you posted. The truth will set you free. Having to censor yourself sucks. It’s your blog your feelings, be FREE. If someone doesnt like it, they dont have to read it. Or they could take a sec to try and see things through someone elses eyes. Im sure it will be great. Oh and your blog is always interesting, and relatable. So Happy New Year to you and your beautiful Family. Cant wait to read new posts!
Jessica just wrote Still Alive!
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
says:
Thank you – that was a sweet comment.
Twitter: theleakysippy
says:
i have found myself writing posts with that exact same thought running through my head. i am trying to be a more upfront, honest person in my everyday real life & i am going to try to bring that to my blog.
i think you are awesome no matter what your views are on things! you have a great blog & i would hate to not have you here to read. i’m glad you decided to stick around!
Happy New Year!
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
says:
I feel so refreshed when I click your blog, I love that you always have a stance on things. I’m taking a page out of your (virtual) book to go back to basics on here.
I’m glad you’re going to be more honest. I should really follow suit. There are a ton of topics and things I want to write about but am afraid of negative reactions. I think I’ll try harder too.
Ps. I love your blog and won’t stop reading no matter what you write.
Alyssa just wrote No words
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
says:
You are always so honest on yours – that’s why I love it. I feel like you just say what needs to be said with no holds barred.
Twitter: jessesco
says:
I look forward to all of it! I know you’ll be awesome. And the asses? You just hit the delete button.. Happy New Year, friend!
Jess@StraightTalk just wrote Resolutions…
Twitter: TheNextMartha
says:
Your voice is important and it matters. It’s yours. Only you can speak it. You deserve to be heard. I’ll be here listening.
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
says:
Thanks lady.
Yep, been there, felt that! HOORAY for you for being willing to step out and take a risk…and perhaps create some awesome conversation as you go. It helps us all go deeper and grow right along with you. Looking forward to reading more!
Becca just wrote The One Where She Loses Her Mind
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
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I’m hoping that it creates conversation! I want to be open and honest, but in a way that encourages people to ask or discuss and not just get upset. If that happens, I haven’t done what I wanted at all.
Twitter: babyfeet3
says:
your honesty is one of the things I’ve always admired in you. And if you DO ever want to post something anonomysly (sp) I might just know somewhere you can vent. Maybe.
kim just wrote A Few Of My Favorite Things
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
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BWAHAHAHA! Love it.
Twitter: schwandy
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I know this feeling. I’ve been struggling with the same issues. I’m glad you decided to start over here and be true to yourself. Good for you for putting yourself out there and taking that risk.
You have a lot of support behind you.
Twitter: lifeasaSAHM
says:
Thank you! I think it’s a point you reach in blogging where you just think – what am I doing?
Twitter:
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I agree with all the other ladies! Bring it on Diana. Your opinions and your beliefs are welcome and refreshing in the typically mild-mannered world of Mommy blogs. Looking forward to more honesty and ‘hot topics’. Happy New Year!!
Alexia just wrote Merry Christmas Baby! Part Two
Twitter: ruthhill74
says:
This is great! I hope that all goes well for you!
Ruth Hill just wrote Thoughtful Thursday-God is Still Using Books!
just starting reading more “mommy” blogs in preparation for my own little one. already liking yours…a lot. many stars in my Reader. and i’m totally on board with your blogging goals. i’m interested to read more from your heart.
Laura just wrote Beet red