Sitter Interview Day

This evening we’re interviewing a potential new sitter.

Our current one has been with us over a year now. I honestly am having a hard time with her leaving, and so is Bella. She’s been here for the entire pregnancy with Kaden, the loss of him, and helped us with the aftermath. She stepped in to give my parents a break when they watched Bella as we took care of Kaden in Dallas, and then again to care for our pets before we came home. She’s been our date night sitter, our on call sitter, and made sure she was handling Bella’s questions correctly after Kaden died. She’s crafty and creative and does the dishes for me -

She’s amazing.

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4 Years Ago

4 years ago today I sat down on a clunky desktop and typed out this post. I was tired. I was bored. I was stuck inside all day with a 2 month old.

I missed writing and had been sucked into blogs by Beth Anne and Ashley‘s way of writing their lives for an audience.

4 years.

How long did I struggle with coming to terms of writing on here?

This has been a much different story on here than I imagined 4 years ago. I never thought I’d have documented almost losing our first home, watching Sam rejoin the military, a move to El Paso, or deciding to homeschool.

I’ve chronicled Bella’s life and her milestones, announced twins, an adoption, and another baby. This blog holds three of the start to finish lives of my sons. I’ve cried and grieved and railed against God. I’ve fallen in love with my husband all over again and again.

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Head Above Water

This is how I’ve felt the past few weeks. Like I’m out in a giant ocean of work/life/baby/life and am just treading to keep my head above.

It’s not all the time. But when it hits, it hits hard. Social media tends to dump it all at once. I can go weeks with nothing. My own blog and a few posts here and there, but some weeks everything comes in at once.

Our sitter has been gone to visit family since mid-April. She’ll be back next week and I can’t tell you how thankful I will be. Writing with a 3 year old is not an easy task, and by her nap I’m so tired I end up falling asleep as well – which is when I could work. As third trimester progresses, I find myself slowing down more and more. Partially because I’m huge. Partially because most of my treks are to the fridge.

Mostly because I can’t remember what I got up for in the first place so I wander around trying to figure out what on earth I was going to do.

Mostly that one. :)

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These Days.

I haven’t written on here because all I want to write about is


but we don’t “officially” have the orders yet. Hai slow military life. And I’m nervous I’ll jinx it or have to come back and say, “Never mind, we got El Paso again.”


It’s so monumental in life to move that it’s kind of all consuming. Oh, and I’m alone with a preschooler all day so there’s also that. I tend to think about things that are coming to pull me through the looooong days without Sam.

12 more days by the way. He’s been gone 5 weeks.

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I Thought I’d be Bored.

I really did. When Sam left, all I could think of was passing 7 weeks of Bella and I staring each other down.

77 hours of face time a week. Excluding naps and night. That’s a heck of a lot of time to fill when you don’t get an evening or weekend break for a little while.

But, it’s been the opposite. I’ve been so busy in fact that it’s hard to find the time to fit in a lot of things. Between doctor appointments, therapy appointments, work, playdates, taking the cat and dog to the vet multiple times, and then just life in general – most night I collapse into bed around 9 and pass out.

Thankful that the time has flown, we finally found a sitter, and today leaves us 3 weeks to go without Daddy.

Here’s what else I’ve been working on in the meantime:


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